The transcript of presentation of annotation 2

Ok, I’m the one who cannot accept extramarital affairs. In my annotation one, I have talked about the…umm…mental damages which the abandoned partners need to suffer when their spouses having affair, and this time I will discuss the influences to the children. Most of the people …umm… focus on the influences…which are caused by divorce, and…and thinks that if they don’t get divorce, their children won’t be hurt. But the author thinks this is not totally the truth. The truth is that…umm…at the moment when kids know their parents have an affair…have an affair…,the damages have already done, and it doesn’t matter… whether getting divorce or not, so these harms will affet..affect kid’s future… life in their future.

Umm…Some parents who have affairs… often deceiving themselves about the impact their infidelity can have on their children. What’s more, they..umm..they…they often think that they can cover up all the truth. But in fact, children are very sensitive. They will know there is something wrong between their parents, even though they don’t understand...they don’t actually under…understand…what happened. For example, they will wondering why...umm…daddy and mommy fight every day? Or… why daddy always come home late? Um…or… why they don’t seems to love each other like before? Therefore, if you are perfunctory to explain the truth to them or cannot… give them …an appropriate…appropriate explanation according to their age, when they grow up, they will think…umm…their parents… have been unfaithful to them as well.(pause)

And the direct damage that caused by parents’ affair is that…it can change the kid’s attitude to love and the relationship between couple. They…no longer believe in love and…or you can say they hold a doubtful att…attitude to it.(pause)…umm…here I will read some real responses by those…children whose parents have…ah…whose parents have affairs: “I still find it hard to trust my boyfriend when he is late, not with me or doesn’t answer his phone. I feel like he’ going to leave me at anytime.” And another one is a mother talking about his son, “My son, who’s married, once asked me if I thought infidelity might be in his genes because of the fact that his father was se…serial…serially…unfaithful.” Also, a mother said that “Her adult children find it hard to trust and respect his father because he lied to them and still denies he had an affair with the women to whom he now…he’s now married.” (Pause)…all these reflections show that parents’ affair…umm… make children feel insecure in love. Some of them will even be hostile to the opposite gender…and might use affair as a method to hurt your spouse in their future marriage.

Besides, it’s inevitable that both parents will feel anxious and on…umm and angry if the affair is exposed. So that’s why they often forgot to think of the stress which children need to shoulder. The worst situation is forcing children to take sides. By tearing child’s loyalty in two, umm…parents will inflict the profound damage. Especially for those abandoned partners, they will eager to find some support from their children to console their hurts and want to fight…fight against their spouse. Umm…even if this behavior is reasonable, but it still have many side effects. The obvious one…is that one of the partner will lose contact with their children after they separate.

   So, do not think affair is only a matter between you and your spouse. It’s related to the whole family…and will cast…and will cast unfading shadow in their mind. So, please say no to affairs if you don’t want to hurt your family. Thank you.